Dirty Work

You gotta bring the bacon home too? It's a pretty dodgy world, friend-o, let's be clear. It's probably going to involve getting the hands a bit dirty, on the odd occasion. Just getting by might require a corner or two being cut, once in a while. Keeping the home fires burning could mean having to take some poor sod out altogether. Putting food on the table may entail having to nick it in the first place. Furthermore, in order to make ends meet, the truth, at times, may warrant a damn good stretching. Some of this DIRTY WORK will inevitably come to attention of the cops. Don't worry, that's only natural.

A parish priest under the pump, a band on the make, a celebrity chef on the lam, a family of dedicated recyclers hard at it, a put-upon author with an axe to grind, a disappointed developer on the prowl, a pastor with a new take on an old theme, a lawyer on the job, an elderly aunt off with the fairies, a PA with unfortunate connections and a miracle or two thrown into the mix. And the youngest detective in South Australian police history on their collective tails. And that's just the humans. There's even more DIRTY WORK going on right under their noses, although they're too busy just getting by to notice. DIRTY WORK is hard-boiled detective parody. A parable in four parts, dishing out the facts of life, shithouse though most of them are. Like it or lump it. Whatever you happen to be.

Detective-Sergeant Eddie Martin, nursing a cappuccino, is getting the lowdown on this Brett Sody character from his number one detective, Pete Young, who's nursing an organic chai latte with almond milk, extra turmeric and extra ginger. As usual, the lad's been thorough. He takes a big sip of the chai and gets his notebook out. 

DS: 'So, Pete. This bloke, Brett Sody, what's the story? What'd you find out?'          

Det. Pete: 'Righto; B.S. was born in St. Kilda, Melbourne, 1958'                              

DS: 'A Vic?'                                                                                                       

Det. Pete: 'Family moved to Adelaide when he was 14. Been here ever since'            

DS: 'Got a record?'                                                                                             

Det. Pete: 'Put out a few back in the nineties as a member of 'The Love Mussels'        

DS: 'Police record, Pete'                                                                                      

Det. Pete: 'Zip'                                                                                                    

DS: 'Right, so he's one of those muso types'                                                         

Det. Pete: 'Played in a lot of bands'                                                                       

DS: 'What's he do for a crust, this Sody character?'                                               

Det. Pete: 'Got his own recording studio'                                                               

DS: 'That a fact? What's it called?'                                                                       

Det. Pete: 'SodyPop'                                                                                            

DS: 'Isn't that an Asian soft drink?'                                                                       

Det. Pete: 'He had the name first'                                                                        

DS: 'Anything else?'                                                                                            

Det. Pete: 'Won Most Outstanding Studio Engineer'

DS: 'When's that?'

Det. Pete: '2000 S.A. Music Industry Awards'

DS: 'Yeah, okay, big deal. What else?'                                                                   

Det. Pete: 'Inducted, 2016, into the South Australian Music Hall of Fame'                 

DS: 'What for, Pete?'                                                                                           

Det. Pete: '25 years of unquestionable musical excellence'                                      

DS: 'Okay, not bad; that it? What about writing?'                                                  

Det. Pete: 'Wrote, produced and m.d.'d 'A Journey Through the Past'                       

DS: 'Bullshit, that's Neil Young, everybody knows that'                                          

Det. Pete: 'Not the Neil Young album, this was a stage play with music'                   

DS: 'Never heard of it'                                                                                        

Det. Pete: 'Based on the book Neil and Me by Scott Young'                                     

DS: 'Oh yeah, how'd it go?'                                                                                 

Det. Pete: 'Pretty good. Put on 4 sellout shows 2012 & 2013, Adelaide Fringe'            

DS: 'That it now?'                                                                                               

Det. Pete: 'Wrote the screenplay for HOME, an 18 minute short film'                        

DS: 'I'm beside myself. Another award?'  

Det. Pete: 'Of Excellence, Chief. 2014 Canada International Film Festival'                    

DS: 'Big deal. So what's he done since?'                                                               

Det. Pete: 'Been working on his debut novel'                                                         

DS: 'Oh Jesus, not another wannabe writer'                                                           

Det. Pete: 'Afraid so, yeah, yet another one'                                                          

DS: 'Tragic. All right then, go on, what's the book called?'                                      

Det. Pete: 'Dirty Work'                                                                                         

DS: 'Dirty Work? You in it?'                                                                                  

Det. Pete: 'Among others'                                                                                    

DS: 'How's he going with it?'                                                                               

Det. Pete: 'Done'                                                                                                 

DS: 'What's it about?'                                                                                         

Det. Pete: 'Shall I read you his spiel?'                                                                    

DS: 'Go on, humour me'                                                                                      

Det. Pete: 'A satire about the struggle to get by, whatever you might be'                  

DS: 'Spare me. A spoof is it?'                                                                               

Det. Pete: 'Sort of. He's working on the follow-up as we speak. Dead-set keen he is'             

DS: 'What's he calling that, Pete? More Dirty Work?'                                             

Det. Pete: 'Bang on, Chief'                                                                                      

DS: 'So Pete, what's your take on this Brett Sody character?'                                  

Det. Pete: 'I say we leave him alone, see what he comes up with'                               

DS: 'Good plan, Pete. He got a website?'                                                              

Det. Pete: 'www.brettsody.com'                                                                             

DS: 'Keep me posted, Pete'                                                                                 

Det. Pete: 'You got it'