Growing Old with Noise!

The collection, "Growing Old with Noise" contains two stories or novellas. The first, "Under the Snow," deals with a spouse's situation in caring for and in loving a husband as his dementia worsens. In this story there is no question that her husband suffers from a memory disorder. Like many in that situation, she tries to find a balance between his needs and her own as a person. There is a moral dilemma in trying to achieve that balance. The heroine's choices, given her age and circumstance, may not satisfy or please every reader. In her frequent visits to the various memory units, she develops a friendship with a young veterinarian. He is visiting his wife who suffered a severe and debility stroke during the last months of her pregnancy. Though the circumstances of the heroine and this younger man are very different: (she is dealing with progressive dementia in her spouse with little hope of recovery and he has every hope that his wife with physical and cognitive therapy will return to him), they find great comfort in each other. This comfort leads to a physical and emotional attraction. There is intrigue with relatives in their attempts to do the right thing for their spouses and for themselves. A little boy with Down's syndrome proves that second chances in life can provide unexpected, wonderful and loving opportunities. This second chance may require stepping out of one's comfort zone and exploring a whole new life situation. In addition to dealing with the progression in dementia from the perspective of the care giver in the case of the heroine and her husband, there is the overriding issue of aging and the important question "Why should we age peacefully and fade away without second and third chances in life?" This first novella considers that question of possible additional chapters in one's life, regardless of age. And of course there is the question of love and romance between two people of different ages. The second novella, "The Gift of Now," also faces 'fading away peacefully without second and third chances in life.' But it also confronts another issue for some seniors: being labeled or declared senile erroneously. This could be attempted by well-meaning relatives or by those who would seek gain or at least the release of responsibility by that declaration. And this labeling could be completely without merit. Yet, it might or could result in a senior being moved to assisted living, a specialized memory unit, or a nursing home when no such placement was needed or justified. The heroine and the hero of this story fight being shoved away and both embark on new adventures. Their love for their cherished animal companions is a constant theme throughout the story. Though initially they lived in the same town, they had never met until their adventures in escaping well-meaning or not so well-meaning relatives brought them together. There is friendship, heartache, and romance. The second novella, "The Gift of Now," explores the reality of how two seniors fight back against a nursing home placement and greedy relatives. A new situation out West offers much in the way of adventure and a second chance in life. In the course of both my professional life (I was a psychologist for more than 35 years) and my private life (I have/had members of my close family and my extended family experience dementia) I have loved, worked with, interacted with, and cared for persons with various forms of dementia. Some have been older than myself and some much younger. I tried to be as respectful and patient as possible. I feel I accomplished this in my professional life, though with my family members I know in certain instances I failed. I was not as patient as I might have been. Writing about feelings and about some of the behaviors I observed did help me. I hope the same for my readers.