Parenting with an Attitude

Ed believes that addressing child-rearing issues and difficulties is usually best accomplished by working more with parents than with children. His reasoning is that, as parents deal more effectively with their issues, what likely follows is a new, improved, and usually more successful approach to raising their kids. It is his belief that “kids are not usually ‘the problem’ but rather the symptom of something in the parent’s efforts that needs fine tuning. Fine tune and adjust the parenting and you will get the desired results in the behavior and growth of your kids.”

PARENTING WITH AN ATTITUDE…..21 Questions Successful Parents Ask Themselves Thoughts and Ideas for good parents who want to be better parents Most of us parents know the importance of consistently looking for ways we can improve our parenting skills; we ask questions, and we want answers to those questions. Often, however, in our efforts to be better parents we ask the wrong questions like, "Where have we gone wrong?", "Why won't Jason ever listen?", "Why aren’t my kids as easy to raise as the neighbor’s kids?", "Why do they always prefer being at someone else's house than ours?", and, "Why me?". PARENTING WITH AN ATTITUDE….. 21 Questions Successful Parents Ask Themselves, instead focuses on some of the more important questions parents must ask themselves if it is their goal to raise healthy and prosperous kids. It is written for parents who want to ask themselves the right questions- questions that will help fine tune their efforts and attitudes with their kids. By doing so, they will be more likely to raise great kids who grow up to be emotionally healthy adults, rather than chronically angry, discouraged or defeated. It has long been my belief that if we want to see a change in the other person , it makes good sense to first look at ourselves to see what part we might be playing in actually perpetuating and reinforcing in the other the very behaviors or attitudes in them that we dislike and would like to see changed. It stands to reason, then, that if we can “fine-tune” how we function in a relationship, it is more likely that some the changes in the other person we’d like to see just might come about . I believe this principle applies also to us as parents-that as we fine tune our attitudes and actions in our efforts as parents, the results are likely to be behavior/attitude adjustments in our kids- and growth in our relationship with them as well. So in keeping with this notion, PARENTING WITH AN ATTITUDE…..21 Questions Successful Parents Ask Themselves, is different than most other parenting books on the market today. What sets it apart is that its focus is primarily on OUR efforts as parents and what we can do differently, rather than on our kids and how we can somehow extract a change in them. As you consider 21 of the more important questions successful parents ask themselves, I would also suggest that you focus on the parenting style and attitudes with which you were raised. Often, much can be learned about how we parent, by looking back at how we ourselves were parented. To assist you in this self-evaluation, I have asked several questions at the end of each chapter that will help you assess how your current parenting efforts might be shaped and affected by how you yourself were parented. In addition, several other questions are offered at the end of each chapter to help you and your spouse discuss, co-ordinate and fine tune your own parenting efforts. Ed Wimberly, Ph.D.

Dr. Ed Wimberly began his professional career 35 years ago in Santa Barbara, California where he continues to be in private practice. After receiving a bachelor’s degree in 1968 from Westmont College, he earned a Masters degree from Arizona State University in 1971 and a Doctorate in clinical psychology in 1976 from United States International University in San Diego, California. According to Dr. Wimberly, “While it is important for parents to adopt an effective approach to parenting, the attitudes we hold toward our kids is of equal-if not greater-importance to successful parenting. And It is only as we develop the right and proper attitude toward our kids that our parenting approaches will result in the desired outcome; without the proper attitudes toward them, whatever approach we choose will not in the long run be effective”. Understanding and fine-tuning our attitudes as parents is what PARENTING WITH AN ATTITUDE is all about”. He believes too, that it is usually more productive to work with parents than it is to make their children the focus of treatment. “As parents fine tune their parenting skills and attitudes, what likely follows is a new, improved, and more successful parenting experience. And in turn, better behavior and attitudes in our kids is likely to follow”. He believes that kids are not usually 'the problem' but rather the symptom of something in the parent's efforts that needs adjustment. He believes that as we evaluate, fine tune and adjust our parenting attitudes, we will usually see desired changes in the behavior and growth of our kids. Ed has served on various boards of non-profit organizations, including the Santa Barbara YMCA, Shelter Services for Women, Sports Outreach, and Kid's Cancer Network. He has also served on the Alumni Association of his undergraduate alma mater. He has published articles in various magazines and newspapers, including Kid's Vermont News, Melbourne's Child, Mom's and Dad's Florida Magazine, Parent's Line in Maryland, Parent's News in Illinois, Santa Barbara Family Life in Santa Barbara, Sydney's Child, and Ventura County Parent Magazine in Ventura, California. In addition to working with parents and married couples, he also treats individuals and conducts groups and marriage seminars. He has been happily married for 40 years to Joan, and is the father of two grown and wonderful daughters. Ashley and Allyson.