At nine years old, Julia survives a random abduction and rape in her Upper Eastside neighborhood in New York City. Terrified and traumatized, she runs home expecting safety—only to have the adults she lives with not notice she was missing and has just survived a violent crime. Trapped in a home where speaking the truth is dangerous, Julia feels betrayed by her grown-ups and resorts to living in a constant state of hyper-vigilance, deciding this is the only way she can cope with her trauma.
When she is 14, she is forced into an unwanted adoption by a narcissistic Jewish stepfather and her Catholic mother determined to eradicate her daughter's 100% Puerto Rican heritage. Julia struggles to make sense of her identity in a volatile household marked by religious and cultural differences with physical and emotional consequences ever-present. She is suffocating under the weight of her family's secrets, abandonment and her parents' alcoholism when she becomes entangled in a child molestation case within the family.
Soldiering on, Julia builds what she believes is a successful life. She graduates from college, begins a career, and tells herself she's moved beyond the wreckage of her past. But her trauma doesn't vanish—it percolates like lava in her brain. After being trapped in New York City on 9/11, Julia's painful past comes roaring back, when her mind and body begin to implode under the weight of her undiagnosed PTSD. Debilitating panic attacks, severe anxiety and a "fight or flight" haywire response in her amygdala leave her convinced she is dying.
Through years of intensive therapy, medication, and her fierce resilience, Julia begins to reclaim her life—no longer burying her trauma but, confronting it. "How Could They Not See?" is a powerful and inspiring memoir about surviving severe childhood trauma carried into adulthood - and a resounding reminder to fellow survivors: your pain is real, resolving your trauma is crucial and, living your best life with PTSD is possible.
