An Ounce of Prevention

Is there a way to prevent—and stop—violence and abuse in intimate relationships? This book, the first in a series aimed at helping readers better understand domestic abuse, explores how that information can be used to teach readers to make positive choices about their own physical and emotional safety and the physical and emotional safety of their children.

Is there a way to prevent—and stop—violence and abuse in intimate relationships? This book, the first in a series aimed at helping readers better understand domestic abuse, explores how that information can be used to teach readers to make positive choices about their own physical and emotional safety and the physical and emotional safety of their children. Gary Kirby's long-term goal is to eradicate domestic abuse, so that no child is forced to witness violence or abuse of any kind or feel the need to cover their ears to drown out the screams. As a society, we aren't doing a great job of accomplishing that goal. But, there is hope. An Ounce of Prevention explores: • Understanding and recognizing violence and abuse in intimate relationships • Reviewing the Cycle of Violence • Understanding the characteristics of violent and abusive individuals • Understanding the characteristics of an abused individual • Developing safety plans to keep themselves and their children out of harms way • Helping others who may be in violent or abusive relationships • Personal experiences and insights of the author to relay information and add clarification It's known that children growing up in violent and abusive homes are at risk of repeating that behaviour in their future relationships – they may become the perpetrators of violence and abuse, or they may become victims of violence and abuse. To end that repeating cycle, we need to put past assumptions (that violence and abuse in intimate relationships is only about power and control) aside and focus on understanding what has happened in a person's life to cause the violent or abusive behaviour in their current relationships. We need to empower positive change. Through this, and future books, it can be believed that with this deeper understanding we, as a society, will be better able to assess the types and scope of services required to deal with violence and abuse that may one day lead to reducing the violence and abuse we now see in intimate relationships.

Gary Kirby knows about violence and abuse in intimate relationships. He grew up in a home filled with it, and grew up to become an angry adult. He spent much of his life trying to discover why he was so angry. That journey led him to an Anger Management program, which began the healing process and allowed him the opportunity to help others by first volunteering and then being hired to facilitate and co-facilitate these anger management programs with a local agency. Besides working with batterers in these programs, he was one of the first people hired, along with a psychologist, to get into some Junior High schools in Calgary, working with angry youth. His experiences and ongoing research have given him a unique perspective on the root causes of violence and abuse. His focus is now on expanding society's understanding of violence and abuse, hoping this will provide keys to new and more effective ways of dealing with violence and abuse in our society.