After my girlfriend of eighteen years dumped me, I took a look back at my life to see what made it worth moving forward. Working as a stagehand for forty years—with musicians such as Prince, Mick Jagger, Tony Bennett, and Michael Jackson, along with actors like Michelle Rodriguez and Will Smith—provided many memorable stories, as did my travels around the world: scuba diving, trekking through jungles, and cycling up mountains.
There's also the story of learning to be a better person and how to grow in my relationships.
I never set out to write a book. I didn’t consider my life to be any different from anyone else’s. In the beginning. I was just keeping a journal and feeling sorry for myself after my ex left, but then I was inspired by some of the people in my life to write about my past. By the time I finished writing, I began to see that maybe my life was different—not so average.
My values have always been a bit different. Most people want to earn a lot of money to be considered successful—own a home, have children, drive a new car, and collect lots of expensive stuff. Not me. I just wanted to work with talented and creative people, to make enough money to eat and live indoors. I wanted my life to be adventurous. I wanted to see the world.
Most people told me I couldn’t live this life, couldn’t work the job I wanted. “What will be your fallback job? How will you make real money?”
Who cares? I thought. I’ll worry about that as I go!
Now, more than forty years later, I have a lot of great stories about my adventures, the incredibly creative people I have met along the way, and the places I have been.
I haven't become rich. I don’t own an expensive home or car, or many possessions, but I have lived many of the dreams I had as a child.
Being a stagehand is challenging—it’s hard work. It’s not just a job but a way of life. Some people pass through the profession, but for us lifelong technicians, it takes dedication. Long hours, sleep deprivation, and working while sick or under unpleasant conditions are all part of the job. Most of the time, we work in the dark, in the cold, or under the broiling sun. There’s a lot of crawling and climbing, a lot of lifting and pushing heavy gear. It’s dangerous and dirty. And you miss many milestones of family life: holiday gatherings, birthdays, weddings, births, and funerals.
But still, I love what I do.
Make your own life an adventure!
Review of Stagehand: A Backstage Pass to My Life Stories
by David H. Aretsky
An Inspiring Journey Through Life's Backstage.
A heartfelt and deeply personal memoir that offers readers more than just a glimpse behind the scenes—it's an invitation to explore a life shaped by passion, perseverance, and personal growth.
Aretsky's candid storytelling captures both the grit and glory of a life dedicated to the art of stagehand work. From the challenges of physical labor and long, grueling hours to the moments of creative collaboration with talented artists, his journey is both raw and inspiring. His reflections on personal struggles, particularly the heartbreak following his ex's departure, make his narrative profoundly relatable and emotionally charged.
What sets this memoir apart is Aretsky's unfiltered honesty about the sacrifices made in pursuit of a non-traditional life. He doesn't just recount career highlights; he shares hard-earned wisdom about resilience, self-discovery, and the importance of staying true to one's values, even when the world doubts your path.