Apologize My Ass

"Is it braggin' to say I saved a town?" It was 1972, one of the hottest summers on record in Opp, Alabama: The City of Opportunity. Everyone was talking about how hot it was and not much else, The closest large town's TV station antenna being down and they couldn't watch their shows. It didn't take much to set people off. Everything was a little faster to happen and ripple through the small community –population 6,493. Twelve-year-old Oliver Ellison loves his summers with his grandparents. Riding his bike here and there between his grandmothers' lessons on becoming a gentleman, Oliver is seemingly invisible to adults, so he manages to overhear a lot. One of his favorite stops is the gas station of his miserly and misanthropic old-maid great uncles. It is here that one evening he witnesses the conversation that ultimately sets off the spark of disagreement between the two old brothers, igniting the town as everyone chooses sides. Narrated by the now fourteen-year-old Oliver, along with an omniscient third person, what follows is a pairing of the absurd with the sentimental as Oliver tries desperately to tell the truth of what he heard, and bring Opp back to its simple, magical place as the City of Opportunity.

"Apologize My Ass" is a captivating and nostalgic coming-of-age novel that transports readers to the sweltering summer of 1972 in Opp, Alabama, also known as the City of Opportunity. Young Oliver Ellison cherishes his summers in this tight-knit town, where life lessons, both good and bad, are woven into the fabric of his upbringing. Armed with his trusty bicycle, Oliver effortlessly traverses the town of 6,493, shuttling between his grandmothers' houses and immersing himself in the vibrant tapestry of daily gossip and local affairs. This particular summer proves to be more challenging than the rest as Opp grapples with record-breaking heatwaves. People strive to keep their cool, but tempers run short, exacerbated by the unfortunate incident of two young boys crashing their truck into the Dothan television station antenna, rendering everyone unable to enjoy their favorite shows. Boredom and irritability tinge the atmosphere, setting the stage for an unexpected turn of events. Amidst the sweltering heat and simmering tensions, Oliver regularly visits his two eccentric and miserly great-uncles, who own a gas station conveniently located between his grandmothers' homes. Perched on a stool, Oliver silently absorbs the conversations that flow freely between the old men, feeling invisible to the adults around him. It is during one of these eavesdropping sessions that he overhears a seemingly innocuous conversation that quickly spirals into a misunderstanding. This misunderstanding ignites a fiery feud between the two brothers, spreading like wildfire throughout the town. Lines are drawn, and the once-harmonious community finds itself divided as people choose sides. Fueled by a genuine desire to set things right, Oliver, now fourteen years old, takes it upon himself to share the truth of what he heard, aiming to restore peace and the simple magic that characterized Opp as the City of Opportunity. Narrated by Oliver, with occasional assistance from an omniscient co-narrator, "Apologize My Ass" weaves together absurdity and sentimentality in a captivating narrative. It is a tale of good versus evil that showcases Opp's diverse and eclectic cast of characters, stimulating the reader's imagination from the very first page. Bellicose, audacious, comical, vindictive, narcissistic, wise, and brave—this coming-of-age story breathes life into all the facets of humanity.

Born and raised in Alabama, Lee Smith attended Birmingham Southern College and then the University of Alabama School of Medicine. Following graduation from medical school, he spent three years as a resident physician in family medicine at Tallahassee Memorial Medical Center. Dr. Smith has practiced family medicine for the past thirty-four years in South Georgia. He is married to the lovely Valerie Lynn Smith. Together they have seven children and eight grandchildren. Dr. Smith enjoys spending time with family and friends, playing the trumpet, BAMA football, and Boston Terriers,