And So We Begin

People are under a common misconception that violent behavior is restricted to physical evidence of force. This is only the tip of the iceberg. When you understand drama and conflict, it's easy to see the subtle forms of manipulation that people use on a daily basis to meet their own needs at the expense of others and most often at the expense of those they love. From the mother in the coffee shop shaming her young daughter into moving faster towards the car, to the absent and avoidant father, to the driver who loses their cool on the road, to the person incarcerated for a violent crime, violent behavior affects all of us and creates traumas that go on affecting the way we think and act. This effect is progressive. Left unchecked it will slow us down, and at its worst, it will destroy lives. Imagine a way to identify this societal disease, heal from it, create a happy, safe and prosperous life and change the lives of people you contact on a daily basis. You will find the formula to that way of life in this book.

Do you relate to any of these statements? If so, you will benefit from this book and the solution presented here. • I am unhappy in my long-term relationships. • My work relationships are tense. • I get the feeling my kids avoid me. • My relationship with money is not satisfying. • I would not describe my home life as consistently peaceful. • I frequently lose or switch jobs. • I don't understand why people get angry with me when I'm only trying to help. • I am sometimes shocked by how I treat customer service people. • My relationships with my children are tense or stressful. • I suffer from road rage. • I hear myself say things that I know I will regret later, but I can't stop myself. • I make jokes at other people's expense. • I feel surprised when people admit they are afraid of me. • I blame others. • I judge others frequently. • I often believe I am right and others are wrong. • I assume that others are not as intelligent as I am. • Drama seems to follow me. • I often feel frustrated, angry, sad, or lonely. • I can't keep my opinion to myself. • I don't have much sensuality in my life. • My life lacks true and fulfilling romance. • I struggle with money and abundance. • I meet my own needs at the expense of others. • I allow others to meet their needs at my expense. • I keep score in relationships. • I call people names. • My life would be better if others would just…

Since 1994, James M. has utilized the tools of 12 Step meetings, spiritual practice and therapy to overcome alcoholism, drug addiction, sexual abuse, money issues, codependency, and depression. Despite all of this inner-work, he was still unable to control his conflict-oriented outbursts and abusive behavior, which ultimately kept him small in his career and unhappy in his relationships. After a number of confrontations with police regarding domestic violence charges, he sought help by voluntarily enrolling in an anger management course. The education he received was vital in avoiding prison or seriously hurting someone, but not enough to stop the cycle of abuse in his own behavior or the behavior of those he attracted. He would improve for long stretches of time, only to find himself in the same mess months later. Over time these dramatic events worsened. Realizing that his condition was progressive, he recognized the need for a daily routine and reminder of his condition; a consistent program of recovery from violence. Thus, Violence Anonymous was born out of a desire to lead a happy, productive life and an understanding of the power of the 12 Steps. For months James held a "men's only" meeting in Austin, Texas. Occasionally other men joined, but mostly he was alone. He knew that the 12 Steps had saved his life from the torture of alcoholism and drug addiction, so he kept on, praying for warriors with the courage to face this personal and societal malady.