The Unethical Bible

The Bible, as written by a non-believer, which tracks the inter-human ethics and actions of the Bible's characters.

An irreverent abbreviated version of the 1769 King James Bible from a non-believer’s standpoint. It includes a running commentary on its stories’ ethical worth, and is also the world’s first-ever complete statistical survey of the Bible's ethics when judged by 21st century standards. Throughout the text, all of the loving, generous, fair & good, evil, unethical, ridiculous & mythical, and contradictory & hypocritical edicts, actions, statements, and beliefs of the Bible’s characters are color-coded so anyone can see how frequently and where each type of thing occurs. The final chapter contains charts which total up each of the 27 color-coded categories and provides statistics showing the percentages of each when balanced against the grand total.

A person of world renown, in his own eyes, Blaise Moran attended the prestigious University of Tijuana. After completing literally weeks of arduous study, he decided that the life of a petit-bourgeoisie academic was beneath him. Solving world hunger would not only be more emotionally fulfilling, but would look better on his resume when applying for an internship at Dave’s Waterbed and Mattress World. After winning two Nobel prizes -- one for Mathematics by discovering the square root of -1; the other for Peace by personally spoon-feeding every starving Ethiopian -- he dove into the dramatic world, winning four Oscars for Best Key Grip. Never one to be idle, When not climbing Mt. Everest on his hands, he spends his spare time correcting flaws in Isaac Newton’s calculations, advising Lawrence Krauss on Cosmology, and enjoying a weekly query from the Pope on scriptural discrepancies. A man of few friends, he’s hard pressed to find people adequately stimulating enough to merit his intellectually superior attention. The UnEthical Bible is his first foray into the literary world. Taking into account the amount of anthrax-laced mail he’ll receive as a result of it, it’s a safe bet to assume it’ll be his last.