Smart Parenting

Every healthy infant who comes into the world has the ability to grow into a confident, contributing, independent yet connected-in-relationship, child/adult. Many children complete their journey to adulthood successfully. The child grows into a functional, courageous and self-assured adult. For some children, though, positive growth doesn’t happen. The child gets stuck and struggles, sometimes throughout her life, and may or may not ever grow confidence and develop maturity, even as an adult. When a child succeeds in becoming an achieving, skillful and compassionate adult, it is the result of a complex dance between parent and child. The dance starts with the child’s birth, progresses throughout the growing-up years until, in that child’s late elementary and teen years, parents see if she’s equipped to courageously handle what life hands her. This booklet contains 80 bits of information that explain how and why both the healthy and less healthy child/adult develop. These 80 bits provide a good basic outline of the complicated journey known as “growing up.” Joan Chamberlain has been a couples and family therapist for over 30 years, and has helped countless people to know themselves and their loved ones better, enriching their lives and relationships permanently. She breaks down unhealthy beliefs and helps clients to build newer, stronger ones that can provide the framework for a lifetime of personal growth.

Every healthy infant who comes into the world has the ability to grow into a confident, contributing, independent yet connected-in-relationship, child/adult. Many children complete their journey to adulthood successfully. The child grows into a functional, courageous and selfassured adult. For some children, though, positive growth doesn’t happen. The child gets stuck and struggles, sometimes throughout her life, and may or may not ever grow confidence and develop maturity, even as an adult. When a child succeeds in becoming an achieving, skillful and compassionate adult, it is the result of a complex dance between parent and child. The dance starts with the child’s birth, progresses throughout the growing-up years until, in that child’s late elementary and teen years, parents see if she’s equipped to courageously handle what life hands her. This booklet contains 80 bits of information that explain how and why both the healthy and less healthy child/adult develop. These 80 bits provide a good basic outline of the complicated journey known as “growing up.” Covered topics include: • Baby’s First Needs • Child’s Belief Formation • How to Grow a Healthy Child/Adult • Good News • The Discouraged, Resistant Child’s Formation • Understanding the Discouraged, Resistant Child • Managing the Discouraged, Resistant Child Joan Chamberlain has been a couples and family therapist for over 30 years, and has helped countless people to know themselves and their loved ones better, enriching their lives and relationships permanently. She breaks down unhealthy beliefs and helps clients to build newer, stronger ones that can provide the framework for a lifetime of personal growth. ______________________ “I first visited Joan Chamberlain when I was fourteen years old. I am now twenty-eight, and for over half my life I have depended on her counsel and guidance to help me through the hardest times I’ve experienced and the toughest decisions I have had to make. As a youth, I had opportunity to appreciate her warmth and compassion, and now as an adult I have grown to appreciate her honesty and keen insight into the layers of personality, belief, and relationship that make each of us who we are. Joan is a very professional counselor and skilled author, but more importantly she is a skilled observer, teacher, and friend.” - Edward “We can’t thank you enough for the gift of you in our lives. Your wisdom and patience has provided the window for us to learn, change, and grow in countless ways.” - Corrine and Karen “Because of your help, I am able to be restored and start anew. Will and I thank you.” - Anna “We are forever in your debt for not only saving our marriage, but making it and us better than we ever knew it/we could be.” - Catherine and Mark “I am writing to say thank you for being in my life and helping me become the person I am today. The many hours I spent in your office were invaluable, though painful at the time, worth every tear that was shed! I cannot imagine what would have become of me had I not been blessed with you coming into my life. I am eternally grateful to you.” - Susan “Joan Chamberlain is a godsend. My wife and I would still be stuck in one spot, racing at top speed but going nowhere, if it weren’t for her. It is because of her that our future is no longer some uncertain, scary eventuality that we hurtle toward, terrified. She has a way of cutting right through the nonsense to the very heart of our issues, guiding us firmly – but with great care – toward a happier and more fulfilled us.” - Rick and Meg

“Your spirit never ages, so share it.” Joan Chamberlain is an author, therapist, and life coach with over 30 years of experience helping adults, couples, and teens. She has a Bachelor’s degree in Business and Finance, a Bachelor’s in education, and a Masters in individuals, couples, and family counseling. Her book, Smart Relationships, has helped many people achieve the self-awareness needed to see themselves honestly. Its wisdom has helped them work toward improving their relationships with themselves, their friends, and their families. “Joan Chamberlain is a godsend,” says one client. “My wife and I would still be stuck in one spot, racing at top speed but going nowhere, if it weren’t for her. It is because of her that our future is no longer some uncertain, scary eventuality that we hurtle toward, terrified. She has a way of cutting right through the nonsense to the very heart of our issues, guiding us firmly – but with great care – toward a happier and more fulfilled us.” A kind and inspiring therapist, coach, and teacher, Joan is dedicated to helping others expand their understanding of who they are, where they’re going, and how they are going to get there. She believes that knowing oneself is critical for success. Understanding how our personalities are both unique and the same is the key to what makes vibrant relationships of all kinds work, and to how we can turn out balanced, emotionally-wholesome children. “Passion is knowing what you want and never stopping until you get it,” says Joan. “My passion is working with individuals to help them explore their inner life, to maximize their talents and to lead fuller, more alive, more contented lives.” Joan Chamberlain lives in Chesterfield, MO, with her granddaughter Tiffany, and continues to counsel individuals and couples, all the while publishing a website, books, and paper for those wishing to maximize their happiness.